Smorgasbord

- Can we get a round of applause for random friends on facebook. I'm talking about the people who send you friend invites and have ZERO mutual friends. I have received quite a number of these recently....all female. The most recent one was a girl who is from St. Louis, Graduated HS when i was already in year 5 of college and went to school at Tennessee State. I have only ever been in the St Louis airport on a layover on the way back from Dallas. I couldn't put Tennessee State on a map if you were offering me $1 million (my guess would be in Nashville since its the capital but who knows.) So why? why is this girl asking to be my friend? What in the world is this about? I've never spent significant time in either place....i didn't make any friends when i was there.

The other couple weren't exactly like this girl...they had at most 5 friends in common but still nobody that i ever hung out with on a regular basis. I am just wondering what it is these people are gaining from adding randos as friends on facebook? Do you get a microwave at some point if you have over 5,000 friends? Is it like a part of the Amazing Race? Are they getting paid by Google to add people? Can i ask more questions about this to nobody in particular?

-Bar culture...So my friend Chad and I went out for a mutual friends birthday in the Arena District. A little background for those of you keeping score at home...i like going to bars about as much as this cat loves the pool. I don't really like bars because they're just dumb. This probably has a lot to do with the fact that i don't really enjoy parties either...I'm more of a quiet kind of guy. I prefer chillin on the couch with a couple people to standing around and yelling to have a conversation. So back to the bar....and probably the highlight...or low light depending on your point of view. For a solid 30 minutes the same girl is grinding on my butt....no matter how much i move forward thinking that i was in her "dance bubble" she just followed me like i was the pied piper. I finally turned sideways and started watching an osu-michigan wrestling match that was on tv and talking to my friend cam. The girls get frustrated at my lack of action towards their mating dance and grab their coats and leave. I think to myself..."finally i can relax and not be so worried" oh i have never been more wrong in my life. You see when i turned sideways i was know up against a table that was occupied by 4 ladies all 40+. The one lady needed to sit down and so i apologized to her for blocking her path....she replied with "don't worry about it I'm finding standing up...if i need you to move I'll just grab your ass and squeeze"....WHAT?....what is going on in the world when cougars are threatening to grab my ass and girls are grinding on me? I left shortly there after and on the way back home commented to chad that that was one of, if not the, most awkward moments of my life.

-So my roommate Buergel, Chad and two other friends Deidre and Whitney and myself are sitting at applebees waiting to order our half price apps. Our waitress comes over and asks us what we would like to drink....so me trying to be courteous to this fine restaurant employee tell her i would like two strawberry lemonades. She comes out firing with the "oh my gosh are you going to be high maintenance tonight?". This is like open season, blood in the water for both Buergel and Chad....its a non stop barrage for a good 30 seconds of calling me high maintenance for the simple fact that i didn't want to make her go get another drink for me as soon as she came back to take orders. How stupid of me to try and think of her by making her job easier. However towards the end of the night she did make the comment that she hates when people have finished their drink by the time she comes back. So she was making fun of me for something she hates! I don't get it....and pretended to be upset for the entire night....although i think this was some middle schoolesque ploy for me to ask her for her phone number by being mean to me. Jokes on you Joanna I'm no Peter Gibbons. Although i do about the same amount of work and have always dreamed of eating cheetohs at my desk.

-thats all thats in my head for now...I'm sure there will be more to come

who knows I may make it 3 for 3 days...don't hold your breath though