Friday, February 27, 2009

F5 Friday

Wow...there are at least 100 other things i could have done with my time that would have been more productive than what i did today. However, nothing would have been as entertaining as what i did on this particular Friday.

The day started with me reading that the Browns had traded Kellen Winslow, arguably our best offensive player, to the Tampa Bay Buccaneers for "undisclosed draft picks". That's right we don't even know what we get in return for our best player....awesome. This led me to sitting and talking to fellow browns fans for a couple hours about what we were exactly doing with our team this year. Other Browns news some friends and i are going to the NFL Draft in late April. We went last year and i really should blog about our draft of the best weekends ever...that blog is coming i promise.

Then i moved to Caribou with Chad where i parked my butt in a chair from which i didn't move for a solid 2-3.5 hours. I agree with Chads entry about how he enjoys himself some Caribou. I just enjoy the frou frou coffee they serve and the people watching the seem to present every time I'm there (more on that subject later). This current Caribou experience i outlasted a solid 10-15 people that came in. sat. drank their coffee. dilly dallied and were on their way.

There was also the occasional gchat conversation. Most days are filled with a gchat conversation with Cam. He works at a job where he sits in front of a computer for the 8-9 hours hes at his job...and i don't really have anything to do so i end up talking to him over gchat most days.

Then the highlight of my people. watching. ever.
People watching might be one of my favorite past times ever. This one starts with a guy sitting and drinking coffee by himself waiting for his friend to get here. The guy looks strangely like this guy from the show Alias In walks a lady that looks to be having a terrible day...they greet each other with a handshake from across the table. Then the guy scoots his chair around the table from 12 o'clock to right about 7 o'clock....and gets out a pad and paper and scoots DANGER CLOSE. He is literally sitting on the end of his chair and pretty much in her lap. She looks like shes about ready to cry and hes going on and on about the way she is a serious hands talker....I can't tell what hes writing down but its not like a therapy session because he hasn't written anything shes said in the past 5 minutes down. I have no idea what shes ranting about but it hasn't forced the guy to move back at all. There have been several "Dr. Phil" ish moments where he is talking to her and puts his hand on her shoulder to help explain his point. He is also a hands talker and keeps moving his hand as if to convey the point of something going on and on...very weird. Other random happenings from this people watching experience. 1) she has tried to leave on multiple occasions but never left the chair....not that he physically restrained her but she would grab her purse and not make it past getting up. 2) Towards the end it went from talking with his hands to pointing 1 finger at her as if something was her fault. 3) They are awkwardly close but still look to be arguing. 4) I wonder if they've noticed me people watching them for the past...oh 30 minutes?

I can honestly say this was one of my top 5 people watching experiences. Several questions have been left unanswered in my mind. Most of them being of the "how do i categorize these two" variety. Were they therapist and patient? Were they on a very very awkward first date? Were they brother and sister? Or are they all of the above?

Monday, February 23, 2009


- Can we get a round of applause for random friends on facebook. I'm talking about the people who send you friend invites and have ZERO mutual friends. I have received quite a number of these recently....all female. The most recent one was a girl who is from St. Louis, Graduated HS when i was already in year 5 of college and went to school at Tennessee State. I have only ever been in the St Louis airport on a layover on the way back from Dallas. I couldn't put Tennessee State on a map if you were offering me $1 million (my guess would be in Nashville since its the capital but who knows.) So why? why is this girl asking to be my friend? What in the world is this about? I've never spent significant time in either place....i didn't make any friends when i was there.

The other couple weren't exactly like this girl...they had at most 5 friends in common but still nobody that i ever hung out with on a regular basis. I am just wondering what it is these people are gaining from adding randos as friends on facebook? Do you get a microwave at some point if you have over 5,000 friends? Is it like a part of the Amazing Race? Are they getting paid by Google to add people? Can i ask more questions about this to nobody in particular?

-Bar culture...So my friend Chad and I went out for a mutual friends birthday in the Arena District. A little background for those of you keeping score at home...i like going to bars about as much as this cat loves the pool. I don't really like bars because they're just dumb. This probably has a lot to do with the fact that i don't really enjoy parties either...I'm more of a quiet kind of guy. I prefer chillin on the couch with a couple people to standing around and yelling to have a conversation. So back to the bar....and probably the highlight...or low light depending on your point of view. For a solid 30 minutes the same girl is grinding on my matter how much i move forward thinking that i was in her "dance bubble" she just followed me like i was the pied piper. I finally turned sideways and started watching an osu-michigan wrestling match that was on tv and talking to my friend cam. The girls get frustrated at my lack of action towards their mating dance and grab their coats and leave. I think to myself..."finally i can relax and not be so worried" oh i have never been more wrong in my life. You see when i turned sideways i was know up against a table that was occupied by 4 ladies all 40+. The one lady needed to sit down and so i apologized to her for blocking her path....she replied with "don't worry about it I'm finding standing up...if i need you to move I'll just grab your ass and squeeze"....WHAT?....what is going on in the world when cougars are threatening to grab my ass and girls are grinding on me? I left shortly there after and on the way back home commented to chad that that was one of, if not the, most awkward moments of my life.

-So my roommate Buergel, Chad and two other friends Deidre and Whitney and myself are sitting at applebees waiting to order our half price apps. Our waitress comes over and asks us what we would like to me trying to be courteous to this fine restaurant employee tell her i would like two strawberry lemonades. She comes out firing with the "oh my gosh are you going to be high maintenance tonight?". This is like open season, blood in the water for both Buergel and Chad....its a non stop barrage for a good 30 seconds of calling me high maintenance for the simple fact that i didn't want to make her go get another drink for me as soon as she came back to take orders. How stupid of me to try and think of her by making her job easier. However towards the end of the night she did make the comment that she hates when people have finished their drink by the time she comes back. So she was making fun of me for something she hates! I don't get it....and pretended to be upset for the entire night....although i think this was some middle schoolesque ploy for me to ask her for her phone number by being mean to me. Jokes on you Joanna I'm no Peter Gibbons. Although i do about the same amount of work and have always dreamed of eating cheetohs at my desk.

-thats all thats in my head for now...I'm sure there will be more to come

who knows I may make it 3 for 3 days...don't hold your breath though

sunday night baller

i honestly sat here trying to think of a post to appease a few people who want me to update my post more than once a month so it can officially be called a blog. So i settled on talking about my favorite winter past time of

- I played in an 18+ basketball league this season with a mix of former and current Young Life leaders in Columbus. The league was held at Olentangy Liberty and we played on Sunday nights. This was our second season in this league and we were looking to build on our disappointing season of not making the playoffs the year before. We had a decent regular season finishing a respectable 5-2. I say respectable because our team consisted of guys who had no experience playing college ball....wait that's a lie we had 1 guy play 1 year of D3 ball for Defiance College....but other than Adam nobody else was even offered to get paid to go to school to play basketball. I only mention this because a slight run down of the league will give you an idea of who we had to guard on a weekly basis

-The Phoenix Foundation...aka Otterbeins 2001/02 National Champ. team...their big men could play inside and shoot from 3 (aka not fun to guard). This team went undefeated in the regular season.

-Average Joes....defending champs of the Powell 18+ league featuring Tim Schafer starting tackle for Ohio State in football c. 2005-6 (roughly 6'5" 290 pounds)...also featuring multiple guys that could bench press a fiat

-West Side Shooterz...not the best team but they had multiple people who played college basketball...although we did beat this team

-Mosher...they had a guy who was 6'6 230. This man showed up at 7:01 when we played at 7. At approx. 7:02 he had already won the opening tip and dunked on us...good start eh?

-The Lost Shepherds...this team had a guy who played at UNC...yes like the Dean Smith/Michael Jordan UNC. I should probably mention that said guy was at minimum 55 years old but was without a doubt the best shooter in the league. I watched him in pregame warm ups walk around the arc and didn't even hit the rim for like 15 shots....Yours truly guarded him and held him to 2 points all game (those 2 came on foul shots he hit after i fouled him shooting a 3)

-Abbington All Stars...this team was made of up a couple guys we knew and the rest were just their friends. This team had some talent but never really put it together. They had a guy who was not shy about pulling up and launching 3's from right around Sunbury (that's a joke that probably only 1 or 2 people will get...sorry)

-There was 1 other team but they were awful....i mean Detroit Lions bad....they didn't win a game and actually didn't show up the last two weeks because they were that bad

-Finally there was our team....the Cbus YL team.
Justin Wilson - our only real size at 6'4" but more of a natural 3-4
Chris Welter - our leader. 6'2" and probably drew their best interior player most of the time
Chris Ramsey - probably our 2nd best pure scorer
Ben Woerth - shut down defender and back up point guard.
Brian Baertsche - probably our main point guard....felt bad for barch because he has shoulder and back problems and actually got his shoulder popped out in a game this season.
Chris Light - 6'1 and a fierce rebounder...
Adam Konsat - our assassin...our only college level baller...he hit 7 3's in one game this season true story.

Then there was me....#00. I was actually only supposed to be a sub for this team...i never payed but went to every game. The guy who ran the league actually joked one game, because i left on my fleece pullover when we had enough guys to where i didn't need to play, that i got in trouble with the coach and was being benched for disciplinary reasons. I did have a career high game of 8 points but probably averaged right around 1.7 ppg for the season.

Wow....looking back that is a lot of crap i just wrote....I'll just try to sum up the regular season and playoffs because that's just ridiculous.

The regular season we finished 5-2. We lost to The Phoenix Found. (team otterbein) and to Average Joes (defending champs) but we actually beat the team where we got dunked on by the man who should probably be playing pro ball in Europe (Mosher).

The playoffs were another story....we were happy to make it since we missed out last year. Since we finished 5-2 we drew the #3 seed. We took on average joes a couple sundays ago and i was actually nervous walking into the gym....I'll give you a minute to regain your composure after reading that i was nervous to play in an adult basketball league playoff game.....but this was my first game that meant something other than getting to stay on the court for an extra 30 minutes. We had the lead from the start and were actually up 7 at the half. With the game winding down we kept floating around a 7-8 point lead but we were starting to tense up. The one peculiar thing about the Powell League was that the clock runs until the final 2 minutes of each half. This can either help or hurt you, if you're up and you get fouled you can take your time when you're at the line and drag more time off the clock and vice versa.

The final 2 minutes of the game was very tense....we turned the ball over. they made ridiculous 3's. we couldn't make foul shots. they couldn't miss foul shots. So here we are with under 10 seconds to go and they have just taken what i believe is their first lead of the game 45-44. We get the ball to Adam our best shooter and have him take the ball up the court....what you are about to read i am not proud of but have laughed it off and am now ok with publishing over the world wide web......and we get called for a charge on a play that if it happens 10 times get called a blocking foul 9 out of 10 times. I am on the bench and cannot believe that it was called a charge. This give the ball back to the other team to hit more foul shots to put them ahead more. I go from on the bench to on the floor and i am yelling at the ref that there was no way that was a charge. I tell him "i respectfully disagree with his call". I then get yelled at by Welter to get off the floor nothing is going to change the call and it doesn't matter. AND IN ONE OF MY MORE BRILLIANT MOMENTS IN 26 YEARS OF LIFE. I yell back "WELL IT KINDA DOES MATTER THEY GET THE BALL BACK".....i know i know great logic. So i get up and am walking around and i pick up my nalgene to take a drink (wouldn't be a YL based team if the nalgene wasn't present) and nothing is left in the nalgene so i just drop it to the floor. (note to self...there is really nobody sitting in the stands....there is at most 30 people present.....gyms kind of echo when you drop hard plastic onto wooden floors)

At this point they have hit 2 more free throws to make the score 47-44 and we now have 1.6 seconds left to do something about it. Welter draws up a play to get Adam a look...Adam gets the ball and from just inside half court lets a shot go, that no joke, rims in and then out. So Team YL goes from up 12 at one point in the second half to up 7 with a minute to go in regulation to losing by 3. That ladies and gentleman is how you play to "not win." After the game there were multiple significant others there to watch and we all decided to go out to Max and Ermas to celebrate a good season. I just want to point out that at M&E's it was 5 couples, Adam and myself. Adam has a gf she just had to work that night....i don't know if the phrase 13th wheel would have applied but that's what i would have been had Adams girl decided to show up. Good times.

So there it is.....our 2008-09 season boiled down to one meaningless and unnecessarily long blog post.

As of the time of this posting i am unaware of who won the league but the money would probably be on The Phoenix Foundation. They're used to winning things.

- My next post probably wont be another month from will probably also cover a multitude of problem is that i have so many random thoughts that i don't feel would necessitate their own post so i just don't post them. My next one will probably be a smattering of random thoughts and such

-Props to you for reading the whole thing even if you didn't like basketball.

-The Cavs - Pistons game is on espn right now.....the cavs cheerleaders uniforms look mysteriously like michael j. fox's team in teen wolf